funny cultural differences

i remember when i first came here...kissing on the cheeks every time we said hi felt weird to me. then 2 years later when i went to america and i wanted to kiss a friend on the cheek and she freaked out that made me laugh..

for some people kissing on the cheeks is even more intimidating than actual frenching. hahah  you won't understand you're FRENCH...

but it's just the matter of adapting yourself to the culture. the world's pretty much international (and it has been for a while now) and if some of you think in japan we still wear kimonos and eat sushi and in russia we only drink vodka and play balalaika..well you're screwed.

but other than that there are MANY of the hidden things in different cultures that nobody ever talks about..i'm gonna talk about it later.

p.s. TOURISTS ARE BLIND

i'm making myself my own personal "AI"

i have absolutely no reason to be alone,  and yet i still manage to stay..single. it's not dramatic. i'm still young. but hell....i deserve NOT to be for god sakes..

so instead of feeling pathetic and undesired i'm just gonna pretend like i have someone. 

...wow...that sounds sad:/

"im fabulous im fabulous im fabulous"....

i might need an escape

remember the last post? well i think i need an escape for "that".

he made himself very comfortable in my head and he's enjoying himself while i'm dying inside. (exaggeration...) and guess what? he's not leaving.

he's staying for another two months or so till my memories will wash him out (like it does for everything else that gets into in my brain..lol) but i'm sure he will manage to leave one of  his long brown hairs behind (okayy...that was gross) and yes, it's a metaphor...a bad one. yeah.

ugh....fuck why does anybody interesting has to be so much older than me? seriously, couldn't your parents make you a year later or something? couldn't they just fight that day and skip the love/baby/the f-ing gorgeous man he is now-making and do it a year later???

change of subject:

people will always find a way to not like you whether you're attractive, hideous, sexy, ugly, stupid, smart ANYTHING. i'm not generalizing it but..

if you have most of it then they'll think you're arrogant and pretentious .

if not they'll judge you by pointing out the things you don't have.

cause in general people focus on anything negative and ignore the goods. ...whatever...

stupid pointless article that i just had to post.

i'm going crazy.

don't know anything about him, he's obviously way older than me, more experienced.

but i just can't help it.  

i'm obsessing already. it's something about that darkness..

there's gotta be something wrong with me.

i hate this me. me being attracted to a big question mark. there's something magnetic about the unknown. i want to know everything i can possibly know about him. and just out of curiosity i already checked out his __. guess what? astrologically we match perfectly.

oh gosh i'm a freak. ain't i? of course i am.

the "what if"s in my head!!! aaaargh

AWSOMENESS

i am awesome, and i don't have to justify myself.

point. blank.

changes that will lead me to a great future.

 
there are good changes in my life. i'm finally doing something that i like...and i will start doing something so huge and i must say unique, that will DEFINITELY earn me some pretty awesome job. 

so i don't really have to worry much about my future. yeah, i know it's way too early to say but..hey....i've got something that no one else has.

but anyways, all of this was to say that *now* doesn't really matter. cause that's really going to be nothing compared to my whole life. well...i won't say "nothing"...but say by the time i graduate, things will be forgotten and people will be forgiven...and my real life that i will make for myself will start only then.

i might even say that....my high-school diploma's in my pocket thanks to the knowledge i'll be given for the next 4 years. 

i'm greatful...for everything. even school for that matter. cause in the end it'll be worth it.

wait a minute. this isn't happening again

the second i thought things were better.......

oh the hell with it. i got stuff going on in my life and i don't give a damn about what others think about me. i won't let them bring me down.
(ohmygosh this sounds like some kind of crappy song lyrics..)

seriously. i will try to do the impossible and be me...not anyone else. i don't think it's the best idea ever but between:

1. being yourself and getting crushed by people cause they don't accept you the way you are and
2. pretending to be someone else and trying to please others and hurting yourself knowingly
 ...i may prefer the first choice.

i mean, let's be honest, either way you get hurt.

stay true to myself.

...block out all the noise

accomplish my goals

My American Accent

HAHAHAHAHAHYAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Ohhh OHHhMyGosh...oh wait MOHWWUAHAHAHAHAHA

Silly..silly silly

MY GOD my earlier posts freaked-me-OUT when i read them the other day. 

well...surprisingly i don't seem to have been REALLY dumb but still a bit...lost in my own emotions. i had to fix some parts that were wayyy too embarrassing though, you know...just in case.

hahah...teenagers...lol

What a surprise.....

school started good. 

that is REALLY weird to say. it's good.... something's good? in MY LIFE? NOO WAYYY lol jk

no but seriously...

the class's good...the only thing that's not good's that there's one little bitch in my class and two morons who get Zs...not Fs, Zs....  other than that....it's alll goouuud. it's rollin'.

and i had my auditions for singing lessons (it's pretty serious y'all) and it went good......holy fuck i survived the first day. i'm SURPRISED, RELIEVED, and MOST IMPORTANTLY alive..lol

BUT THEN AGAIN....there is a BUT....a BUTT.

my parents. ugh.....i WILL sound like a typical teenager but they don't understand me, one of them ignores me and one of them is a hypocrite. i can go on and on about them but i really don't want to cause it'll make me even sicker than i am right now.

but my god...HALLELUJAH!  lord, thanks for not killing me.